In previous posts in this blog, I have written extensively in relation to my bipolarity, my sexual behavior, and the material I have found in my beloved book Beelzebub’s Tales to his grandson. I am now coming to finding peace in relation to my bipolarity. My depressions are gone and my manic states have diminished notably. Sexually I have been behaving like Mr. Gurdjieff in his book Beelzebub’s Tales considers the sexual function as an independent function that does not depend on matters like marriage and children.
I have to confess that during my great depressions, the other side of the coin of bipolarity, my sexual energy is at a minimum, and that I would not engage in sex even with a 20 years old beauty. In other words, sex for me does not exist when I am under the episodes of depression. But during my moments of manic episodes, I am sexually excited and wish to have sex with almost any woman.
For instance, during my latest manic episode, I engage is sexual activity with a married woman. By the way, she told me she has experienced more pleasure than she had ever experience with her husband. This fact confirms the study made by Harvard University in which it was determined that married women have more pleasure with a lover than with their husbands.
Beelzebub’s Tales to His Grandson is my book par excellence. It has taught me to look at the whole process of life. I have learned many things from this book. Among them, the importance of keeping the sexual function or sexual center independent of other functions or centers. Particularly, the sexual center must always be in its function independent of emotions. In this way the sexual energy is freed of all the emotional attachments that today makes life miserable for many of us.
Thanks very much for your attention.