My work with the sexual substance and with Beelzebub’s Tales in general has drawn severe criticism from well-known quarters in the Gurdjieff community. I have practically been told that I am insane when I make some of the affirmations I make. This is understandable because I am working alone and all these criticisms came from people who are members of the so-called Gurdjieff Foundations. In fact, one person said and I quote: “We can theorise endlessly about minute pieces of hidden wisdom in B. T’s but each and every person forgets that one can not travel this Path alone” and then signed his comment with a name followed by this expression: “teacher of G.” Maybe he should have signed “teacher of dancing.” Of course, if he is a teacher of G. he better tell me how I have to behave. It is like those poor Gnostic facing the powerful emerging Catholic Church during times when the Gnostic were crushed by the Church. Another Foundation person said that I may even be sued because of my saying that I had overcome my bipolarity and psychosis using the transmutation of my sperm and now live without medication.
For starters, I am not alone in this path I am traveling. One is never alone. I have Mr. Beelzebub as my guide and have the subtle but true guidance of my awakened Conscience. I can rely on both of them as very respectfully guides. And none is going to sue me because what I write about is far removed from the lives of ordinary people. One has to spend almost an entire life, like I have done, in pursuing these interests, actually forced to pursue them. As a good friend of mine who himself suffers from depression wrote to me after reading my article on how I have worked on my bipolarity and psychosis using the transmutation of the sexual substance put it: “As you can easily imagine, Will, the content of your article is quite alien to the world I deal with in my current life, but I’m glad it has worked wonders in your case. For the time being, I’ll continue to weigh the notion that just as the liver, or the thyroid gland, or the pancreas, etc., etc., etc. can malfunction and make miserable our lives, the brain is not an exception.”
Of course, I also got very positive comments from few readers who are also, like me, working with the sexual substance in their endeavors to find a way out of their own misery. They encouraged me to continue my work and one even made this good positive comment: “Your post is very good, and very brave too, as it takes on the less spoken side of the Work.” I am very glad I had those kinds of responses. One of the best responses I got was from a lady friend of mine: “i have just read your post in your blog about bipolarity. It has been so helpful for me. Thanks a lot will.”
Mr. Gurdjieff left for us a very powerful mantra. It can be found on page 135 of the third series of his writing with the title, “Life is real only then, when ‘I am.’” Here is for your consideration:
I am, I can, I am can
I am, I wish, I am wish
He then further qualifies his mantra with the following words:
If “I am, only then “I can;” if “I can,” only then do I deserve and have the objective right to wish. Without the possibility to “can” there is no possibility of having anything; no, nor the right to it.
I have many times in my life and work on myself used this powerful mantra.
It is six in the morning here in Palm Bay, Florida, USA, where I now live in retirement and when I am writing this note. Now, I am getting up every day at five in the morning to work on my writings and my forthcoming book with the original title “My Life With Mr. Beelzebub,” a testimony of how I have worked with the book for almost forty years. This contrasts with the ten in the morning I used to get up during my infamous days of depression. I am now feeling great and happy without taking medication. I have been able to verify for myself this objective pronouncement of the sagest of sage, our highly esteemed Mullah Nassr Eddin:
I can now move into something else